Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A New 50 Days!!

Ok, ok, ok. So here we are the Tuesday after my sister’s birthday and I have not committed to my 50 days. Fifty days of sobriety will not be back; my readers and friends blatantly shot down that idea. Apparently my recollection of sobriety was much different than y’alls. The sobriety idea went to shit once I decided to have wine at lunch and beer at dinner that day.

I think I’m leaning toward 50 days of running or 50 days of the gym. I would have started it already however I contracted a nasty stomach virus, which left me in the fetal position for 3 days. I emerged from my illness today only to find that I have herniated diaphragm muscles from the intense vomiting. Sexy, right? No.

So in the past year and a half I have gained 29lbs. How and why? I’m a stress eater. I also think I have a compulsive eating disorder. Of course I couldn’t get anorexia or bulimia. My cousin told me I’m just not white enough to get either of those eating disorders. Aside: I notice that I never get the good stereotyped traits from either of my ethnicities. I have gigantic thighs accompanied by a big but, no anorexia or bulimia, and I sunburn. WTF?

Why: We covered that in the last post.

I don’t want people to think I’m hopping on the health bandwagon because I got fat. I mean that is part of it but the ultimate goal is to get back on track with challenging myself. As some of you might remember, there were some rumblings last year of 50 days drunk with my co-conspirator Capps Corleone. The 50 days drunk was supposed to kick off at our first annual $1000 Tab at Café 210 but it never happened. This year we are going to repeat our $1000 Tab at Café 210 in June which will kick-off 50 days drunk. No ifs, and or butts. In order to be properly drunk and assure your body is metabolizing alcohol at the most optimized levels your body has to be a lean-mean-drinking machine.

So, tomorrow I will initiate 50days of working out.

The rules: 30mins of cardio every day for 50days (until April 14th).

Exceptions: If I become ill, are stranded in an airport or some other weird occurrence that might hold me back from my 30min work out I will need to make up the workout session on another day. If I do make up the session it cannot be tacked on to that day’s work out meaning that I will need to go to the gym twice in one day. The workouts have to be separated by at least 2 hours from finish to start.

My alarm is set for 6:20am to assure I get my ass to the gym for a solid work out.

Ok . . . here goes.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011


It’s about that time again . . .to begin another bout of sobriety and see where it lands me. The last time I ventured out into the world with out the helping hand of alcohol I ascended to one of the best times in my life. Instead of drinking and ending up in a pool of my own vomit or in some debaucherous situation I threw myself into playing soccer and spending more quality time with people that I care about. I also lost about 20lbs as a side effect.

Sobriety wasn’t easy. I mean I really like alcohol . . . like a lot . . . definitely more than you . . . but it led to a great many revelations. Allow me to take you back to the beginning . . .. http://50dayssober.blogspot.com/2009/03/why-i-am-better-than-jesus.html

So I have gone from a great ascent to the zenith of my life to now -- rock bottom. My descent was marked by my relationship with a narcissistic leech that sucked me dry financially and emotionally . . . but don’t your worry his well-gelled hair is perfectly coifed. That bad decision Sundae was topped with the cherry of my older brother being diagnosed with lymphoma and losing his life a mere six months later.

Rock bottom --what does that look like? Well, like any normal half-Irish American I am treating these failures with a steady dose of bourbon, wine, beer, high calorie foods, carbs and sex. Of course once I get on the scale this morning to confirm my suspicions of a 40lb weight gain I’m sure the sex-crutch will come to a grinding halt. My new boyfriend is going to be pissed! I’m sure you have gathered that rock bottom is not pretty . . . at all.

50 days sober began in March of 2009, the Sunday after my sister Terry’s 40th birthday. After waking up with a pricker in my foot and no recollection of where my dress or car keys were . . . a change needed to be made. Terry’s birthday is this Thursday . . . . I might start early . . . or just start now and go the 50 days. I sure the fuck am not doing more than 50 days sober. I’m a mess not crazy.

So here goes. . . . . I’m plunging face-first into the ice water. . . .

I’ll leave you with some classic posts . . . to bring you up to speed . .

http://50dayssober.blogspot.com/2009/03/day-9.html

http://50dayssober.blogspot.com/2009/03/days-16-and-17.html

http://50dayssober.blogspot.com/2009/06/two-coke-cans-and-muffin-quality-time.html