I have realized that sobriety has led me to a sense of clarity or I'm crazy and alcohol makes me normal . . . I'm not sure but I think the next 11 days are going to be long ones.
So my good friend Veronica Weinstein and I had a conversation about sobriety:
Me: I think sobriety is making me crazy.
Veronica: You're not crazy. You're awesome.
Me: That's sweet but I'm really going crazy. I need a drink, it makes me normal.
Veronica: Sobriety makes people moody.
Me: I'm not moody anymore, just ancy. I need to have sex.
Veronica: No alcohol and no sex! Whoa, you're a nun.
Me: The not having sex is purely accidental. It's hard to go out and sleep with random people when alcohol is not involved.
Veronica: So are you experiencing any sort of clarity then?
Me: Yes, exactly and I hate it.
Veronica: Clarity is what people strive for.
Me: Well those people are stupid. I need a drink to cloud my judgment and make me whole again.
I'm afraid that over the next 11 days I will impale myself on a broken bottle of bourbon.
Above is an image of a guy smashing a bottle of wine on his head. I'd kind of like to do that right now then drowned in the wine. Fuck my life.
I'm proud of u!!! Just think of the fun we'll have in Miami making up for these 50 days!
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