Day 1

I woke up this morning (at 6am) on my brother's couch in nothing but the comforter I managed to wrap myself in at some point last night. My first thought was, "Where is my dress." My second thought was, "Where are my underwear?" I realized that I lost my camera, which I didn't much care for, and my new favorite scarf, which I cared a lot for. I texted my sister to ask if she was awake. She replied, "NO!". So I proceeded to text her that I lost my dress, camera and scarf. After she did not respond I went back to sleep.

At 9am I woke up and realized that I did not have my car or the key to my car. Hmmm. So I found the key to my brother's truck and drove to McDonalds. I clearly needed something to vomit up in a few hours. As I was driving I realized two things: First, I was still legally drunk. Second, the last thing I remember is Chad pulling me out of the bushes.

I got to McDonalds and ordered a sausage biscuit with cheese (This information is key; McDonalds sausage is better than its bacon, but I digress). I then ordered two more breakfast sandwiches, one for my brother and one for whatever girl he happened to bring home last night (cause you know he didn't come home alone).

I pulled up to window 2, gathered my hangover cure and drive off. Once I was back at my brother's I realized that they gave me 6 sandwiches. Sweet!!! As I was eating my biscuit and hash brown I thought to myself, "I really need to stop drinking for awhile." I fell back asleep.

An hour later my brother came out of his room to inform me that the key to my car was officially lost and that he found one of my shoes in the driveway last night. My obvious response was, "What?"

Apparently, as my friend Chad was throwing my drunken ass into his Escalade I tossed my key to my sister Sarah slurring, "You're the responsible one, take the key to my car."

This is when I knew I had to stop drinking. For anyone who knows my sister Sarah, you know only a delusional person or a crazy drunk person could have said the above statement. As I was listening to my brothers account of the evening the fateful decree of sobriety was born. I decided that I wasn't drinking until Omi's 60th Birthday on April 12th.