I woke up this morning with strep throat. I believe in Karma, so I think life is trying to tell me something.
2:30pm: I've been sitting in Exam Room 7 for 45 mins. Dr. Lazo still hasn't showed up to review the status of my icky tonsil.
Exam Room 7 is in "no man's land" of my doctor's office. It's so far back in the office that staff members come back here to the bathroom next door to drop a deuce. As I'm waiting one lady takes such a gnarly deuce that the stank fills the room.
2:45pm: Dr. Lazo finally arrives. He pulls out his stethoscope to listen to my lungs and heart. As he bringing the amplifier to my chest we both realize that my V-neck tee has worked it's way down creating some uncanny cleavage. He pauses. I start taking deep breaths pretending that I don't notice that the amplifier has not hit my chest yet. My boobs are so big that MY DOCTOR has been distracted by them. Only me!
3pm: The nurse comes by to give me a shot of antibiotic. She gives it to me in the ass. My ass is burning. Fuck my life.
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